The Sweet Spot.

I’m not exactly sure why that title feels right but it does. I think it’s because today was a satisfying mix of productivity and enjoying relaxing time with my family. The kids and I menu-planned, went grocery shopping and baked muffins and made granola bars. The house still smells faintly of rice and cilantro with a hint of basil and chicken. The kids got baths and were tucked into bed smelling clean and fresh in rooms scented with lavender (we’ll overlook the part where Miles rejoined us to eat a banana after thirty minutes of playing in his bed 😉 ).

I honestly love days like this.

Simple things. Sweet things. My heart is grateful.

I don’t want to be so busy I miss the small moments that add a sense of richness to life. Miles cut his first molar through today, Evie learned what a coconut looks like at the grocery store. I tried a new muffin recipe and Tom was able to go for a long run which he enjoyed. It’s the sacred comforts of familiarity, the reassuring presence of my husband being by my side where he has been through many shared life moments, the gifts my children are, the delight of finished chores. None of those things are particularly noteworthy in and of themselves but together they stilled my heart to worship and humble gratitude for this life I have been given.

I don’t always appreciate it all, some days (more honestly, all days in at least some moments) I get lost in the rush of caring for children. Finding missing shoes, answering emails, caring what people think, clicking through tabs, caring too much about other people’s situations, paying bills, washing dishes, folding laundry, planning events, leading discipleship times, contacting people, cleaning the house. I don’t naturally gravitate towards prioritizing stillness but, when I do try to intentionally seek it out I am amazed at the power of solitude and long for more of it.

Tonight I stood on the porch in the deepening twilight watching the fireflies dance amidst the pine branches. You can tell it’s getting late in the summer because of the way the air is slightly cool in the evenings. Autumn and Winter are my favorite times of the year and slight hints of them were in the breeze tonight. The way night falls early in late Autumn is like a thick quilt tucking you in, early darkness lends itself to early bedtime and, like the earth has a break from the planting and harvesting so Autumn and Winter give a break to my body. It’s a season that invites time with family and dear friends, evenings inside playing games, firelight, soup and cider, the holidays and reflection on the busier seasons of our year.

I’m ready for that and yet, I’m also content here. If there’s one thing this last year has shown us it’s how very much is completely out of our control and what a waste of time it is to try and change that. Grief and loss have been recurring themes throughout the year yet, in close proximity (and likely highlighted due to the stark contrast) has been the theme of gracious comfort. We have come to long for Heaven in a new way this year and it has changed us. I’m grateful.

So tonight as the day is done and the darkness falls from the wings of Night, I find myself reflecting on these simple words;

“To make bread or love, to dig in the earth, to feed an animal or cook for a stranger—these activities require no extensive commentary, no lucid theology. All they require is someone willing to bend, reach, chop, stir. Most of these tasks are so full of pleasure that there is no need to complicate things by calling them holy. And yet these are the same activities that change lives, sometimes all at once and sometimes more slowly, the way dripping water changes stone. In a world where faith is often construed as a way of thinking, bodily practices remind the willing that faith is a way of life.”   -Barbara Brown Taylor

Today was a day of bending, reaching, chopping and stirring and my heart and my faith are  better for it.

A Place in Progress: Five Decor & Organizing Tips.

I’ve held off writing a new blog on décor and organizing for a long time for one key reason: I don’t believe there is ONE correct way to do it! I strongly believe your home should reflect your personal style and  what  makes your family unique.

One excellent example of this is the color white – I strongly dislike white. To me it’s a stark, harsh and boring color. I didn’t wear a white dress on my wedding day (for those curious I went with ivory) don’t like white walls or furniture because to me they’re just jarringly  bright and lacking in contrast or depth and you have to walk around on (white) eggshells so you don’t get anything dirty. However, despite my personal dislike of white, some people LOVE it. They wear it, decorate with it, paint with it and it looks great in their homes and in their wardrobe.

However, despite the myriad of opinions on this topic, today I decided to write down a few thoughts on organizing and design (which, to me, are very much the same thing. My design style can be summarized by three words: functional, organized and cozy) because I genuinely enjoy it and love hearing people’s thoughts on the same topics.

Here are the top five things I consider when decorating my home, after you read it I’d love to hear a few of your tips!

1) Have a home for everything you own:

Maintaining a clean space is impossible if everything doesn’t have somewhere it belongs. Too many things will automatically equal a cluttered home which makes organization a challenge (to say the least). When we move into a new place (like we just did a few weeks ago) the first thing I do is choose where we will put things. Everything in our house has somewhere it belongs that is not a pile on the floor or on the kitchen counter. Living like this has required us to pare down what we have – I can’t find places in our small apartment for both of my children to have five ride-on toys so they’ll each have one and take turns using them. I would love to have a set of holiday dishes, formal dishes and everyday dishes (what can I say? I love dishes) but I have no room for them so we have one, multi-purpose set of dishes.

Ironically, I think I’m as organized as I am because I actually don’t really like spending time each day organizing and cleaning – there are a hundred other things I’d rather spend my time doing so I’ve found ways to allow my daily cleanup process to be faster by organizing ahead of time and fitting our possessions to our space. All of that brings me to my next point.

2) Create accessible storage for easy cleanup:

I LOVE BASKETS. I use baskets for everything; blankets, shoes, blocks, laptops, baby dolls, outside toys and books. Baskets allow for quick cleanup and, HUGE BONUS, they’re pretty to look at. Whatever form of storage you use (shelves, canvas bins, baskets) make sure you have it in a strategic place (i.e. near the toys/books you’ll want cleaned up) so you can quickly and easily straighten up (and so little hands can help with it!).

3) Don’t crowd your living spaces:

While there is nothing wrong with living room furniture you don’t actually have to have a couch set, coffee table and matching end tables. The goal is to create spaces in your home where people feel like they can move without fear of bumping into furniture and can manuever without it seeming like they’re walking through a maze. I chose to have our chest (which stores our board games) and our small cubby also serve as end tables and we did away with a coffee table entirely so we’d have a large, open space for children to play. The ottoman easily moves between seats and also stores behind the recliner if we want the additional space.

Our room is to small to comfortably fit two nightstands and a dresser so we chose to have our desk double as our second nightstand and have a cubby organizer be our dresser (can I also just say how easy it is to put clothes away?). There’s no right way to do this the key is just to strike the balance between having furniture and crowding your house with either too much furniture or items that are too large for the space you have.

Create spaces that serve multiple purposes – our entryway is also one of Evie’s art areas and this chest not only stores blankets but is where we sit to put our shoes on since it’s positioned right next to the coat closet. Take advantage of the small spaces in your home – empty walls and small corners are gold mines for children’s play areas, storage or to display decorative items!

4) Stick to classic themes:

I tend towards using classic color combinations and prints in my decorating style – even in my children’s rooms. It definitely fits my personal taste more to do so but it’s also because children’s interests change so fast that I refuse to spend money on a Frozen themed room that will last a year (though, if Frozen is your style, GO FOR IT! I refuse to make decorating a home the kind of thing where there is a right and wrong answer).

I put a lot of thought into my kid’s rooms because I want them to be spaces they can truly enjoy filled with things they love. Evie’s room has her play kitchen, small table & chairs, dolls and stuffed animals, doll stroller, books and dress-up basket. Those are the things she loves to do and I wanted her to have easy access to all of them – the things in her room are all on her level and she can get them herself (and, bonus, clean them up herself!). Miles’ room has his cars, car mat, blocks, and beloved walker and popper toys (also his favorite things).

I love warm, bright colors and prints (there are clearly a lot of both in my home) coupled with neutral items (like my couch, blanket on our bed, Miles’ crib, Evie’s toy cubby) to break up the colors so it’s not overwhelming. Figure out what colors, textures, prints and overall style you love and arrange your home around them. Choosing a consistent color palette will make your home feel unified and put together (even if you feel less so ;)) and will help you avoid spending money needlessly because you’ll know if something does or does not belong in your home. Another bonus of choosing a classic look is that you won’t feel pressured to update your home’s look on a frequent basis.

5) Put the finishing touches on your home:

A long, long time ago I remember being in a friend’s home shortly after they  moved in – as was expected the walls were bare and the furniture was almost the only thing in the rooms. I was there again almost a year later and the house looked almost exactly the same (the main difference was that they had installed a wall-mounted television set). Don’t do that, inhabit the space you live in.

 

Add the touches in your home that reflect who you are and what you love. I love curtains, pillows, lamps, outdoor living spaces, plants, chalkboards, fruit bowls and bright colors. Getting to put those little touches on my home is what personalizes it and makes it feel lived in.

 

Arrange spaces in your home where people can sit and talk. We have chosen not to have a television in our home and one of the most fun things about that to me is that I can arrange all my living room chairs to face each other without worrying about whether or not people can see the television from them. Whether you have a television or not create spaces for conversation in your living areas, create spaces where people can relax, read books, listen to music, build block towers, eat snacks, pray together, dance in circles, look at the stars, apologize, laugh, cry and pray. If you make the space and explain the purpose then nine times out of ten it will be used.

I hope this post accomplishes the goal it was intended for: to give ideas. There is not a right way to keep a home and there is no best way to organize or decorate your living space. Enjoy where you live, make it a home and make it yours without a thought that you could be “doing it wrong” (I don’t think anything saps the fun from arranging your space faster than that).

Now, off to fold the laundry that has been piling up on my bed since 9 this morning.

 

A Letter to my Little Girl

Dear Evie,

I cried washing the dinner dishes tonight (which probably got them cleaner then I’m necessarily capable of washing them). Tonight you (proudly) wore your first pair of big-girl underwear to bed and, for some reason it hit my heart in a way that made it feel like you’re leaving for college tomorrow.

I don’t even know the days spent with you and your brother can sometimes feel so long in the repetitive tasks they hold and simultaneously so achingly short and utterly incapable of containing all the sweet moments that they do. You guys are two of the ones I’ve waited for every moment of my life I dreamed of having children before I was handed you, the girl who made me a mama two-and-a-half years ago. You two (and the hope for your future siblings) are my heart outside my body, my literal flesh and bone.

Your daddy is in class tonight so you asked me to rock you before bed. I snuggled you down with me in the recliner and we whispered about the day for a minute. Usually if I put you to bed we’ll sing, you’ll tell me your favorite part of the day and you’ll (loudly) thank Jesus for something (last night you were thankful for the potty at the park). Tonight since brother was already asleep in my room we settled for quiet, extra-snuggly rocking. Your legs and arms have to fold up to fit in my lap now and your hair is so long it tickles my shoulders when you lay your head on me. My heart aches with love thinking of all the hours I’ve spent rocking you over the last two-and-a-half years. You don’t need it to go to sleep now, it’s just a special time for you and either daddy or I. I want you to know it’s one of my favorite parts of the day.

I carried you to bed, kissed you, reminded you to get up and come to the bathroom when you had to go potty, walked out of your room and burst into tears. Remind me never to cross big milestones again without your father present to commiserate with me over how fast you’re growing up (you reminded me of this the other day – I kissed you and told you how happy I was that you are my little girl and you squinted up at me and emphatically said, “no mom, I a big girl”).

After I left your room I opened the bathroom door and immediately smiled. The fan had been turned on, the light was off and there, perfectly centered on the small rug was your pink teddy bear. Without having seen you do it I already know you rocked bear to sleep, gave her a kiss and said “wheat dweams, bebe gill” (sweet dreams, baby girl) before carefully laying her on the mat (I also know that if I had dared to walk past the bathroom you would have shot me a reproving look and said, “shh mom, bear nigh-nigh”).  Seeing that bear was good for my heart because it reminded me that, though we are inching towards the days of being done with diapers for you, that we are not walking you down the aisle just yet.

It’s still passing all too fast though.

The days of worrying if you were getting enough milk, wondering when you’d sleep through the night, deciding what your first food should be and watching you experience crawling on grass for the first time all seem so far away. I feel the stage you’re at shifting, you are becoming fully a little girl and not-in-any way still a toddler. Daddy and I have been talking a lot lately about how parenting you looks different now. The things you need have far less to do with a schedule and far more to do with nurturing your character. Believe me when I tell you, little girl, we are on our knees regularly asking God for wisdom to teach you. We are learning together (as we have with so many things with you, our firstborn).

I hope that if nothing else we teach you to look towards the future with a joyful spirit and to love other people with a sacrificial heart. I see traces of this in you already. Today your brother fell down trying to pull up on one of your play chairs. He scratched his foot and you were so upset about it. You carried the chair out of your bedroom, down the hallway and into my room so he wouldn’t get hurt on it again and went running back to him saying, “let me see your foot, bubby, I kiss it” (which you did). We badly want to nurture that spirit in you, to show you in Scripture where Jesus loved people that way and to model it for you in our own lives. You’ll need a resilient heart to make it through life with a trusting spirit intact, a heart that knows its identity is found in the Lord because very often people won’t love you back or will forget to appreciate you. That’s ok, you’re still valuable and still enough (more than enough).

There have been a lot of things that have happened this year that were completely outside of your parent’s control. Hard things. Sad things. Our goal hasn’t necessarily been to protect you from all of them but to begin, in an age-appropriate way to teach you to handle difficult things and to teach you (as we learn) to love people and receive love from people in the midst of this messy, broken, in-the-process of being redeemed thing that is life. God, grant us grace to do that.

I know we’ll have easier stages of parenting you than where you are now and harder ones. It’s good for me to take the time periodically to write it all out like this because it reminds Daddy and I to just enjoy it all as best we can (which for us means enduring the hard moments without spending needless time complaining about them). We love you, Evie Claire and we hope that even at your young age you’re able to feel our joy in the little woman you’re becoming.

Sweet dreams baby girl,

Mommy

 

When Comes the Rain.

Sometimes the most profound thoughts are whispered to the surface by the rattle of a drain pipe and the soft glow of streetlights. As raindrops knit heaven to earth God’s invitation to worship draws me outside to the porch, nearer the sky.

Maybe profound is to strong a word for these simple thoughts. They’ll likely change no one’s life  but mine and, yet, even if they only change mine they still feel significant enough to write down. For me, intentionality leads to better remembrance of Truth.

This season of life is a breathless waiting. The gathered breath of preparation before the long exhale of change.

Waiting for results, waiting for our precious son to enter the world, waiting for grades, waiting for fruition, waiting for answers.

In all the waiting it’s so easy for my eyes to be centered on tomorrow, on then. To overlook the subtler, mundane joys of today. Of right now. 

This afternoon I sat and watched Evie watch the rain.

She heard the drops start pounding the porch roof and immediately ran to “her” green chair and with a “mama…pease” was situated in it, snack in hand, to watch the puddles forming under the eaves.

(if she only knew how much joy her delight in the rain brings her mama).

She sat there for a long time. Soaking in the muted beauty of what was without a care towards tomorrow or later.

Time passes too quickly to waste a second wishing for the next thing. 

It wasn’t that long ago that I was cradling her in my arms, a newborn who only knew milk and mama and now she sits, snuggling her baby doll, asking me for cheese and watching the rain. Her brother kicks excitedly around, nestled close to my heart for now, in no time at all I’ll be watching him awaken to the world.

Today, with every bit of its hardness, goodness, uncertainty and beauty is a sacred gift, wrapped with a hundred different bows. The satin of Evie’s cheek as she nestles down on my shoulder at bedtime, the delight in Tom’s face when he sees dinner on the table, the quietness of a neighborhood temporarily hushed by the continuous rain, the vibrant red of a cardinal brave enough to visit the bird feeder in the downpour, the quiet sense of accomplishment as Tom finishes a long weekend of class, the joy of hearing familiar voices on the phone and knowing that the Grace that sustains will be new in the morning.

We are never truly overwhelmed, never truly defeated because what sustains us, the core of our identity is Eternal and Untouchable. Unhindered by tomorrow and undeterred by yesterday.

I can face the future “ever confident” in that reality.

“Work in me more profound and abiding repentance;
Give me the fullness of godly grief, that trembles and fears, yet ever trust and loves, which is ever powerful, and ever confident;
Grant through the tears of repentance I may see more clearly the brightness and glories of the saving cross.”

I can delight in the unanswered questions of today, not because of my planning or forethought, but because I know Him. I can surrender my husband and children (far easier said than done) because I know that tomorrow is in the best possible hands. I can acknowledge the heartbreak of this world, mourning with those who mourn, because I know it will one day be overcome.

Living in today frees my soul to delight. It frees my mind to worship. It frees my voice to praise and my heart to laugh.

Lord, grant me the divine grace to remember the truths whispered to my heart on a rainy sabbath when my body trembles in fear. When the unknown is dark. When the path is shrouded. Bind my unwilling feet to rocky paths that I may glean the irreplaceable treasure of You.

Freelancing from Home in Forty-Seven Simple Steps.

1) Position toddler on recliner with books, cheerios and milk.

2) Second guess the milk as her new favorite game is “clean up” which involves vigorously shaking her sippy cup upside down.

3) Take away milk.

4) Toddler starts begging for “wawa”. Return cup and vow to watch her extra-carefully with your third set of eyes to prevent needing to scrub milk out of the recliner.

5) Sit down with laptop.

6) Realize laptop is dead and charger is upstairs.

7) Go upstairs for charger while toddler frantically waves bye-bye and dissolves into a flood of tears because, clearly, you are leaving FOREVER.

8) Bring charger downstairs.

9) Remember there was a charger downstairs all along.

10) Wait for laptop to come to life.

11) Toddler has read all of her books and is now twisting herself into the curtains.

12) Laptop is finally on. Open article.

13) Client disregarded word limit and article is 800 words above max.

14) Sigh deeply. Editing out 2/3 of their carefully chosen words always takes some thoughtful explaining.

15) Toddler is bored with playing in the curtains and is now determinedly stuffing her baby doll into an almond milk box.

16) Pause in concern that she’ll attempt to put her baby brother in an almond milk box when you’re not looking. Realize you’ll have to cross that bridge when you come to it.

17) Delete three words of article. First line is now edited. 832423641232387473289 more to go.

18) Toddler chooses this moment to remember that “dada” left for work two hours ago and is now yelling “no, bye-bye, NO” out the front windows.

19) While protesting “Dada’s” departure toddler slips on milk which she has poured under the curtains despite your (not so ) best efforts to avoid that exact scenario. At least the recliner is spared.

20) Toddler has bitten tongue. Mother needs to bite tongue.

21) Five lines edited. Word count down to 700 above max.

22) Briefly contemplate who even has time to write 800 words more then are absolutely necessary.

23) Toddler is sweetly hugging her baby . Smile at her and remind yourself to tell husband you want twelve more.

24) One entire page edited. Is this really happening? Miracles are clearly occurring everyday.

25) Toddler has dragged a bench to the window and is now patiently looking for “dada”. Don’t have the heart to tell her she’ll be waiting at least eight hours.

26) It has now been 37 minutes and you’re only 1/3 of the way through. Calculate your hourly rate to ensure this is still worth it. Realize it is…not. Wonder if your contract has a “toddler milk” clause that allows for a pay raise?

27) Hope that your hasty, highly distracted edits aren’t chopping sentences in half.

28) Toddler has spied a robin hopping down the sidewalk. She is beside herself with joy at the “brrrrrddd”. Melt a little bit at her ability to be delighted by the most ordinary things. Ask for grace to do the same.

29) Two pages down.

30) Toddler is now asking to go for a walk. Consider letting her.

31) White maintenance truck pulls into the spot where “dada’s” white work truck is usually parked. Toddler is ecstatic.

32) Sigh deeply.

33) Toddler realizes maintenance truck is not “dada” and needs a snuggle from mama. She presses a milky kiss to your cheek. Why is there milk everywhere today? No more milk for anyone ever.

34) Try desperately to remember if you called in a maintenance request. Don’t recall anything that is broken (except your ability to edit without interruption – wonder if they have a tool for that?).

35) Realize maintenance man is going to your neighbors. Thank God you can stay in your pajamas and keep “working”.

36) It suddenly starts raining. Toddler is now pointing out the window to show you the “wawa”.

37) Realize it IS a confusing world when she can’t pour her milk on the living room floor but everyone else can pour their water on the sidewalk.

38) ½ page left. The light at the end of the tunnel grows brighter. Hope the light is really the glow of the Keurig’s power button.

39) Toddler is now standing by the front door with the kitchen towel waiting to go outside and clean up the “wawa”.

40) Kiss her a thousand times (despite the milkyness) because her love of cleanliness is your love language.

41) Article. Is. Done.

42) Rapidly draft email explaining to client why their masterpiece was cut by 2/3’s.

43) Try not to take it personally when your toddler points at you and inexplicably shouts “NO”.

44) Send email. Save article.

45) Announce early snack time/coffee time. Toddler seems pleased. Mom is giddy

46) Snuggle toddler on the short walk to the kitchen. Realize how grateful you are.

47) Also realize this is why you aren’t getting much freelancing done lately. Make mental note to determine what else you can cut from the budget to make up the difference. Decide on milk. Definitely milk.

These are the Moments that Make up the Days.

Life is short. 

As unromantic as it may sound that is probably the single, greatest piece of marriage and family advice I’ve read and the one that runs through my head most often in the midst of life’s trials.

When Tom & I hurt each other in the same way for the hundredth (thousandth) time. 

When my daughter pours my water bottle on her pants for the third time in a day.

When the laundry, dishes and cleaning all need to be done. Again. 

When the bills are paid but there’s nothing left for any of the other financial goals we set. 

When “date night” is, once again, in the living room instead of out anywhere. 

When pregnancy pains have me up at night before another long day. 

When the writing deadlines cycle back around. 

When Tom needs a week of evenings to finish major projects and I am alone. 

When family is all far away. 

When Evie is awake at 3:00 a.m. for no apparent reason.

When cold & flu season just won’t end. 

When sunshine and warm weather seem like a thing of fairy tales. 

When Evie is eating veggie straws off the floor because she dropped her snack cup for the sixth time. 

When life is mundane, lonely and predictable. 

When your time with the Lord is punctuated with baby drool and sticky hands wanting to help turn the pages of the “bahble”.

In the midst of Valentine’s Day promotions and celebrations it’s easy to forget that love is not proved by roses, jewelry, spa gift cards, dinners out, cards, chocolate, new clothes, vacations, surprises and time away together. Love is not cemented in the moment of breathless yes that follows a proposal. It’s not sealed by the tears that stain hand-written marriage vows or finalized in the intimacy of a long-awaited honeymoon. Those are beautiful beginnings, sacred starts to a life together but they are not the proof of love.

Like love’s Author demonstrated, love is cemented by the very moments that you think it should be most absent. Arms spread wide on a wooden cross. In the splitting of yourself to serve another. In the gifting of grace at the cost of your own desires. In the laying down of your very life to make another’s life richer, more whole. More sweet.

That’s where love’s true mettle is allowed to shine. To be refined into something stronger than it was before it was broken. That’s where love is proven as the greatest of these. In every one of the moments that won’t make it on a Hallmark card.

When you’ve locked the door and your husband picks it, determined to hear the painful words you need to say. When you have been cut open in the most unexpected delivery so your daughter can enter the world and, despite the pain, nausea and blood he whispers that “you’re beautiful”. When you fall asleep in the middle of something important he’s trying to share with you because it’s late and you’re exhausted. When what he needs isn’t a romantic gesture on your part but just the chance to take a nap on the weekend. When love is stopping to fill the empty gas tank despite your own mental and physical tank being on empty. When your sacrifice isn’t noticed or thanked. When your surprise falls flat. When your hard work is taken for granted.

Those are the moments that make up the days that make up a life defined by love. A life that will be over all too fast.

Love doesn’t take a superhero’s strength. Just a willing heart. It doesn’t require trendy clothes, a model body or a full bank account. Just the commitment to empty yourself and be filled with the passions and goals of the Greatest Lover.

When the overwhelming days come; when my heart needs a reality check to be restored to its mission of love, I remember how fleeting the days are. How much I’ve been given in this life and how precious each day I get to hold my loved ones is. I remember how fragile life is, that while we are promised eternity we are not guaranteed tomorrow. I remember how sacred the role of shaping little lives is and how the most significant things you can do in life are rarely ones that are either visible or applauded.

Life is short. 

When Tom and I hurt each other I have the opportunity to be filled with a demonstrative grace again. To help him move one step closer towards the Lord by receiving grace.

When Evie pours water on her pants I can enjoy the sight of her wet little legs running for the kitchen where I already know she’ll desperately grab the dishtowel off the refrigerator and start drying her pants. 

When the laundry, dishes and cleaning all need to be done I can celebrate the roof over my head, food on my table and clothes on my back. 

When the bills are paid but there’s nothing left for any of the other financial goals we set I can rejoice that our financial obligations are met.

When “date night” is, once again, in the living room instead of out somewhere I can delight in the fact that I have a husband committed to his wife and his family. 

When pregnancy pains have me up at night before another long day I can pray for the little boy growing in my womb and rejoice in the moments I have left carrying him. 

When the writing deadlines cycle back around I can be grateful for the small amount of extra income the writing assignments bring us. 

When Tom needs a week of evenings to finish major projects and I am alone I can spend the time worshiping my Lord and finding new ways to help my family through this season of long days, short nights and limited income. 

When family is all far away I can be grateful to live in a day when communication, sharing pictures and updating each other on our lives has never been easier. 

When Evie is awake at 3:00 a.m. for no apparent reason I can delight in the weight of her small, healthy body and rejoice in the feel of her little arms clasped tightly to my neck. In that moment I am embodied love to her, all the security she needs. 

When cold & flu season just won’t end I can be grateful for the fact that my family has avoided any major illnesses and simply battled a few head colds and an ear infection. 

When sunshine and warm weather seem like a thing of fairy tales I can rejoice in a world that is soaking in its off-season. The earth is absorbing the rain and gray skies as spring incubates. 

When Evie is eating veggie straws off the floor because she dropped her snack cup for the sixth time I can accept the sweet innocence that makes her unconcerned about germs. 

When life is mundane, lonely and predictable I can meditate on three truths: joy is not dependent on exciting circumstances, loneliness is an important part of growth and predictable days are a gift in their own right. 

When my time with the Lord is punctuated with baby drool and sticky hands wanting to help turn the pages of the “bahble” I can delight in the fact that “Bible” was one of the first twenty words that Evie learned. 

Life is short, even when the days and moments are long. The gifts are abundant, even when the wrapping is unexpected. The opportunities for joy are frequent, even when all the circumstances aren’t ideal.

The choice to accept the gift of today is always ours.  Always mine.

The Mom Wars.

Is it just me or have the mom wars been especially volatile lately?

It’s both heartbreaking and deeply disturbing to me to see the way grown women feel they can address one another, especially behind the veil of social media. Why is it so easy to forget (or to blatantly disregard) the fact that our “opponent” on any given topic is a human being with their own life story, set of convictions and love for their child? Why is it so easy to believe that our personal opinions are the ONLY way for all parents everywhere to raise their children? Why does the list of things you can’t or shouldn’t ask about without fear of offending someone grow ever longer? Why are we so willing to sacrifice someone else’s good name to make ourselves feel better about our personal decisions?

The debates over letting your baby cry, cloth diapering, breastfeeding, vaccines, circumcision, co-sleeping, working vs. stay-at-home, formula and about 101 other topics are raging on. The internet is a blessing and a curse in that regard; information and opinions have never been more accessible but, sadly, it has never been easier to find research to be used as ammunition to support any viewpoint. And the enemy on the receiving end of fire? Another mom.

I think one of the biggest sources for the mom wars comes when we allow our value as moms to be defined by our mothering decisions. Instead of choosing to breastfeed we allow ourselves to be defined as a “breastfeeding mom”. Instead of choosing to cloth diaper we are a “cloth-diapering mom”. Any decision about vaccinations will be seen as controversial by someone and, whether we vaccinate, delay or forego our choice can become a defining mark of pride. Whatever our decisions we tend to appoint ourselves spokespeople and champion them when asked (and, often, even when not). We forget that choosing differently than someone else doesn’t make us better than anyone else and far to often confidence in our parenting decisions so easily becomes arrogance towards parents who have chosen differently.

How much richer would our lives be if we didn’t enter the literally endless debates on all things parenting verbally or mentally? I don’t always say a lot about complicated issues on social media or in conversation but, I sure spend the time mentally debating the pros and cons of other parenting choices.

It can feel like an obligation of parenting to read everything, research everything, agonize over everything and consistently revisit every topic to see what you might have missed. It’s endless and exhausting.  It IS our job as parents to make informed decisions for the unique set of circumstances surrounding each child we have. The topics mentioned at the beginning of this post are so hotly debated because they do matter (though, some definitely matter more than others) but, so much of the information out there, on every side of any debate, seems to be written or spoken from a place of such fear or arrogance. I don’t want to live the one life I have consumed by it all and I know a lot of other moms who feel the same way.

Why is balance so much more difficult to achieve than extremes?

Probably because it requires us to make decisions with a calm spirit – not out of fear or pride. For me that is literally impossible to achieve without the continual grace of Christ. Obviously it’s not that Scripture holds a list of vaccination ingredients or schedule for dropping naps – but, when my heart is filled with a peace that passes all understanding is when I am best able to make parenting decisions with Tom for Evie and Miles.

In that place of peace is when I’m free from concern about other’s opinions. Free from the need to consult “one more book” and free from the need to justify my decision to everyone I meet. It quells the fear because, really, I think so many of our parenting debates are tied to our desperate attempts to protect and control our children when the simple reality is that, even the decisions we feel most confident in, don’t come with guarantees.

Part of parenting is accepting the fact that you CAN’T predict the future, protect your child from every potential accident or ensure the outcome you want for their lives. It’s opening yourself up to a very vulnerable sort of love. Accepting that reality (which is a daily choice and desperately hard at times for me) actually reframes the circumstances surrounding so many parenting decisions for Tom & I.  It takes away the fear of “what if” and it allows me the freedom to enjoy what I know to be true today with my daughter instead of spending precious moments consumed with anxiety about what the future holds. And really, isn’t today all we have anyway?

Abiding in that place of peace also helps to helps to silence my need to engage in that many mom debates.

It’s my job to decide if Evie should have a chickenpox vaccine. Yes. But it’s also my job to model the decision-making process for her as a time of careful research and thoughtful consideration – not a time of panic, heated words towards other moms and medical professionals or catty remarks.

It’s my job to decide what kind of diapers we will use. Yes. But it’s also my job to teach my children that there isn’t one right, God-ordained way of diapering your baby and that it’s ok if other moms choose to use cloth, disposables or a combination. It’s my job to demonstrate how to differentiate between major and minor decisions and how to hold convictions with kindness.

So many of the topics we agonize over as moms are somewhat to fully resolved by 3-5 years of age. What remains after that is the ongoing job of raising a child into a man or women who has the tools they need spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically to make it through the rest of their lives. 

What kind of diapers were used is going to matter very little when she’s fifteen. What will matter is how I spent the 10-12 years diapers were a non-existent issue raising her. What will matter is the conversations we had, the apologies I spoke to her and to her father, the grace shown her when she made a mistake, the tone of our home (God, may be it place of peace and hope. May it be a place defined by honesty and love and forgiveness when that tone is broken). 

What am I teaching her by how I’m making decisions for her? 

It’s my job to teach her when her opinion should be shared and when it’s ok to remain silent.

It’s my job to teach her how to take fear out of the equation when making a decision.

It’s my job to teach her when to ask for help.

It’s my job to teach her to be a woman marked by gentleness and respect.

Parenting has stretched me to my limit on so many levels. Just when I think I can’t  love her more she does something new, something silly or something sweet and my heart expands to a level of affection for her that I didn’t know existed. Just when I think I’ve begun to grasp the level of responsibility Tom & I have undertaken in becoming parents I am faced with a new decision that requires me to be doctor, psychiatrist, nutritionist and sleep consultant all at once. Just when I think I can’t be more tired, well, she chooses that night to fight the comforts of her crib for no clear reason ;).

There are a lot of difficult jobs out there but the endless amount of mental responsibility, constant demands for more time and energy and complete inability to change the fact that once you are a parent you are always a parent help me better understand why there are mom wars. Being a parent is hard work.

It’s sad though; as parents, especially as moms, we have the capability to be each other’s greatest friends, most beneficial resources and sources of comfort. Can we please start choosing friendship at least as often as combat? To stand next to each other even when we disagree? To sometimes choose silence even when we have an opinion? To create an oasis of peace in a world that’s crazy enough? To choose calm conversation instead of fear-fueled attacks?

We have to. For the sake of the children we so dearly love, we have to.

The Wholly (and Holy), Transformational Role of Sacrifice.

Yesterday I woke up to a lengthy list of items that needed to be accomplished: four loads of laundry to wash, fold and put away, grocery shopping requiring loading groceries into the cart, onto the belt, into the shopping cart, into the car, into the house and finally…into the pantry (when you’re pregnant every step counts), cleaning and organizing the pantry and refrigerator, meeting the maintenance man to change the air filter, grating soap to make laundry detergent, endless diaper changes, sweeping and vacuuming, cooking dinner, packing a lunch and preparing Tom’s work uniforms for the week, bills to pay and paperwork to catch up on.

On top of everything I had a little one coming down with a cold (her second – third? – this winter. A consequence of the fact that she LICKS EVERYTHING. Ugh) who needed extra time and attention and sometimes who just needed mama to stop and hold her.

Somewhere in the middle of the day, in the midst of many blocked goals and limited accomplishments, I re-read my life quote;

“To make bread or love, to dig in the earth, to feed an animal or cook for a stranger—these activities require no extensive commentary, no lucid theology. All they require is someone willing to bend, reach, chop, stir. Most of these tasks are so full of pleasure that there is no need to complicate things by calling them holy. And yet these are the same activities that change lives, sometimes all at once and sometimes more slowly, the way dripping water changes stone. In a world where faith is often construed as a way of thinking, bodily practices remind the willing that faith is a way of life” (From An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor).

In that moment I was reminded (by the Holy Spirit of God….because I definitely did not have the resources to remind myself) that life is not measured by the amount we accomplish but by the attitude in which we do it. Times where sacrifice is required present us so many opportunities to cultivate a spirit that resonates embodied grace to others and to ourselves. That, that is the holy, transformational role of sacrifice that is available to us if we open ourselves to it.

There are many roles and opportunities in life to sacrifice beyond what you feel you have capability to give. A lot of what I write is drawn from the context I am currently immersed in, mothering, a present tense, action verb that’s ever-evolving in definition and ever-deepening in opportunity for sacrifice.

Evie’s sleep was interrupted often last night. She went to bed at 7 and woke up at 9, 11, 1 and 5. At 1:27 a.m I sat with her on the edge of the bathtub with the shower on its highest setting. The steam filled our small bathroom and swirled in the glow of the nightlight. Evie’s forehead was pressed into my shoulder and her small arms were wrapped firmly around my neck. She breathed in the steam and I felt her little body relax in the warmth of the room and the warmth of knowing mama was present for her.

In that moment I realized I had a choice (again, through Holy Spirit grace).

I could begrudge her repeated need of me through the night; caring for her physically but being emotionally distant. Sometimes I think that’s ok; the amount of sacrifices required of a mother mean that each one will likely be met with a varying level of emotional attentiveness. Mothers are human too.

Yet, in that moment I knew I had more to give her than physical care, something that would also be a gift to myself in the work it would do to transform my own eternal spirit. By grace I gave her the gift of emotional presence in her need. I engaged my senses with hers, put myself in her shoes (err, sleeper-clad feet) and allowed myself to soak in the beauty of her trust without wishing for a different set of circumstances (particularly a set of circumstances that had me still asleep in bed).

Emotional presence is what renders the same situation either mundane and forgettable or eternally transformative. Emotional presence is what opens our eyes to the deeper realities of our everyday situations and the significance they could have to our eternal souls should we allow it.

We each  have every ingredient we need to live a sacrificial life. To be changed by the ingredients of our lives right now, today.

The key is what we do with the painful, unexpected  and altogether mundane aspects of our lives.

The building blocks of trials, difficult circumstances, low-income seasons, relational disappoints, job loss, miscarriage, transitions, loss through death, children leaving, loved ones making choices you don’t agree with (to name just a few) are present in some way and degree in each of our lives. Each of those larger difficulties, and the hundreds of small inconveniences that fill our days, are composed of a thousand, little chances to be emotionally present in the pain, trial or annoyance.

The chance to be transformed just a little more through the sacrifice being asked of you. Of me.

My day rarely holds news-worthy stories of change. I haven’t been called on for any groundbreaking political contributions, made any life-changing medical discoveries, published anything that has changed the world or single-handedly altered the course of a third-world village.

Yet, every single day I have the chance to communicate tiny lessons of grace and responsibility to a little woman-in-training. I have the change to cool a meal, wash a dish, make the bed, say “I love you” and whisper a prayer in a way that communicates the innate value of the people I am serving and the eternal weight and transformational value of each seemingly mundane task.

I can be changed for a little more eternal good on this rainy, cold sick day in early December. So can you.

Sanctification, transformation, is not a separate mission from our earthly responsibilities. Those simple, everyday tasks are how we can be changed into His likeness – should we emotionally present to the wealth of opportunities they hold.

God, grant us eyes to see and the courage to be emotionally present in both the mundane and the groundbreaking moments of our lives. 

The Wild for the Wonderful.

To get the full feeling of this post you should probably turn up this song like I did while I wrote it.  Or this one – which I switched to after I listened to the first one 3748943651923 times. 

____________________

Today is a soaking wet day for introspection. For soul-searching melancholy. For the open-mouthed baby kisses my daughter specializes in. For the whole-body hugs Tom gives me that are actually more like our souls touching. For texted “I love you’s” without punctuation – the most honest kind. The kind that, in that moment, aren’t concerned with periods or exclamation points but with relaying the message.

It’s rain and clouds and the silhouettes of umbrellas marching steadily past my windows and the front of the coffee shop where I’m now writing. It’s the rain-slicked cobblestones that make my town perfect and the hunched shoulders of each dusk-weary passerby bracing the continually pelting rain.

I left home tonight.

For the first time since in months l left with no agenda. I’m not grocery shopping, going to a church meeting or on a planning committee. Instead I’m curled up, barefoot, at the local coffee shop (the kind of place with dinged furniture, crooked menus and perfect music that makes you wonder why coffee shop chains exist). I’m sitting here writing.

I didn’t come with a pre-planned topic just a thought I’ve been mulling over for the last few months.

Self-care, specifically mother-care.

Mothers need care too. Mothers need to reminded of who they were before littles came along because those truths remain a definitive part of who they are as mothers. If you’re reading this and you’re a mom – take care of you. Take the bubble bath, drink the coffee, steal the ten minutes outside at night to just sit.

Nights out like this one help me remember who I am as a woman. As a wife. As something other than a mom. Going to the coffee shop with my laptop to write used to be the norm for me- it has now been so long that I actually forgot where to plug my headphones in on the laptop.

Time away, perspective, is crucially important and life-giving to help ensure I continue to fulfill all three of those roles well; wife, mom and woman.

I think of it as The Wild.

I’m not someone who needs to get their hair done or go for a massage (though I certainly won’t turn it down if you’re offering). I don’t need a shopping trip or time at the mall.

I need the freedom to stand in the pouring rain and stare at things uninterrupted.

I need to breathe in a southern night full of humidity and possibility. I need to have  a quiet moment to daydream without the weight of dinner menus, diaper changes and bills that need to be paid. I need the bliss of doing one thing at a time.

I need to feel the unbridled wonder of nature. To feel the rush of possibilities that come with staring down an open road and seeing the way it winds with abandon. I need to stand on a beach at night and hear the crash of invisible waves pounding an ever-shifting shoreline.

Those things reach deep down into my soul and bring it to life.

They stir me to remember the Big Picture. To look beyond the days of little things, of the mundane chores and list making and to remember. Remember who I was created to be, to remember that life in all of its unbridled wonder, unexpected pain, fragile joys and moments of sheer delight is worthy of being lived with my eyes wide open even when I’m tired, overworked and weary of reading “Where is Baby’s Belly Button?”.

Sometimes it seems that out culture wants mothers to believe they can and should have it all. Freedom and babies, personal time and time with their littles, self-actualization and self-sacrifice.

Yet, on that last one maybe they’re right – we find our truest selves when we surrender ourselves and sacrifice is as intrinsic to the definition of motherhood as love is to the character of God. Plenty of opportunities to lay aside your own desires and, in the process, learn who you are – for better or for worse.

I knew that before I became a mama – as best as you can know something that you have to live to learn. Sacrificing in practical ways for my daughter is something I will do every single day. Same for her dad. Some days it’s hard, that is true, but it’s also something I find extremely fulfilling. I love preparing healthy meals, hanging clean, fluffy towels in the bathroom, putting clean sheets on the bed, making my own laundry detergent, gathering her in my arms to nurse, packing lunches, straightening carpets and filling our home with light and love.

Those things aren’t the true test for me of sacrifice.

It’s surrendering my freedom in The Wild.

The ability to go and do and be anything I want to be at any time. The freedom to hoist a sale and catch a ride whatever way the wind is blowing. The ultimate escape, into a book, for an uninterrupted six hours. Traveling to Mexico with my love. Last-minute road trips just because.

Those things aren’t a definitive part of my life right now. My days are extremely predictable and scheduled. Up at 6:30, naps at 9 and 1, three meals, three snacks, two cups of milk, two nursing sessions, 18 books read, five block towers built, one lunch packed, one dinner cooked, the living room vacuumed, the mail gotten, the bills paid, the calendar updated, the articles written, the cleaning done, groceries unpacked, menus made for the week, phone calls returned.

Repeat.

Every day. All day.

Motherhood is trading much of the wild for the wonderful.

And you know something? As I’m continuing to adjust to that new normal, I’m learning something key. Something that is encouraging me through the busy and often lonely days of mothering and transition as we attempt to build a new life here.

The wonderful can be just as fulfilling.

The wonderful is in my baby daughters eyes when she feels a raindrop on her face. It’s in my husbands smile when he suggests doing something crazy and taking a family walk in the woods. It’s in the companionship of friends who share your journey and in the solace of fellow mothers who are willing to swap jealousy and competition for authentic friendship.

It’s in a whirlwind hand of Dutch blitz with your husband before bed. It’s in the sudden smiles of a one-year old drinking in every bit of life she possibly can before her bedtime. It’s when you hear your husband and daughter playing hide-and-seek upstairs and laughing so hard that the floor is shaking. It’s in those moments that you know, that even though they’re filled with mundane tasks and small things, these are the best days. 

That, that discovery of the wild hidden in the wonderful, starts with the  unmatchable joy that shoots through every painful, bruised and broken part of your body when your child is first handed to you; breathing their first breaths of air and looking for something familiar, the only thing they know- you. 

Someday the freedom of the wild will come again in full force and, you know, I can’t help but think that, when it does, I’ll do anything to trade it back for one more day of wonderful. 

Time will tell. It’s incentive to live the days will a grateful heart knowing that each season is temporary.

And, for now, this season of freedom at the coffee shop is drawing to a close. My husband, who patiently handled bathtime and bedtime for the little, awaits me. He has grown even more dear to me as we continue down this road of life (how is it even possible that we’ll be married three years in December?). There is a lunch to be packed and a final load of laundry to put away before night falls on our home.

Tomorrow is a new day.

A day for making stew, muffins and bread. For cleaning the house and for taking Evie to library storytime. It’s a day for ironing Tom’s work shirts and finishing a phone interview for an article. By God’s grace it will be a day laced with prayer and moments of meditation. A day where I show grace to an eager, active little girl who’s desire to explore her world doesn’t always match my neat plans. A day where I am patient when Tom gets another late call at work and needs more time in the evening to do homework. It’s a day I only have the chance to live once.

And, by grace, tomorrow is a day for wild wonder.

My Top Ten Mama Must-Haves.

Exactly one year ago I was making a baby registry.

I was six months pregnant and dreaming about her little face, the nursery and all the other things that make up my life now (the real thing has proven harder but significantly better than my daydreams).

I spent hours registering. Pouring over options. Trying to guess what would be necessary and what wouldn’t. All of the items on this list won’t be necessary for everyone – but, in the early days of life with a baby who slept better with motion and needed lots of time with dad & mom well, they saved our lives.

1) The Moby wrap

When I say Evie lived in the Moby wrap for her first two months of life I mean she lived in it. We wore her all the time. I desperately bought the wrap late one night at Toys R’ Us (on one of my first babyless outings after she was born). It was the instant solution to us getting some sleep and, honestly, I loved wearing her – she’s still in it occasionally but, at eight months old, has a lot of exploring to do ;).

Added bonus: You’ll feel like a samurai warrior rapidly twirling the ends of the wrap around. Wrapping a baby in it 4-6 times a day means you will get impressively fast at it.

2) Slippers

We brought Evie home on the first day of fall. Winter weather and, for once, snow came quickly and, as any mother can tell you, socks on a newborn are an oxymoron. Evie was given the sweetest pair of slippers (thanks Johnny & Ryan!) that she wore for next oh, six, months – she couldn’t kick them off and they kept her little toes warm. Win win.

Dreamin’

3) Aden & Anais Bamboo Swaddles

These are hands down, without competition, always and forever my favorite baby blankets. We were given one at a baby shower before Evie was born (thanks, Whitney!) and I loved it so much it came to the hospital with us. They’re super soft, lightweight and oversized so I’ve used it as a swaddle, nursing cover, carseat cover and blanket.

This week I finally purchased a few more – that’s right, we went from owning one to owning four of these swaddles. I’m giddy.

4) The Rock & Play Sleeper

When Evie was about three months old we realized that one of the biggest reasons she slept well in the swing was because it was elevated.  

Enter the rock & play sleeper.

I wish I’d known about this from the get-go. It’s lightweight, portable (nice for switching her from our room to the nursery or for going on road-trips!) and it not only kept her elevated but snuggled her in on each side (something she’s always loved).

For a next baby I’ll skip the bassinet/cradle phase and just use this.

5) AlvaBaby Cloth Diapers

I’ve already written a pretty lengthy post about my love of these diapers. Affordable, cost-effective and environmentally friendly? Yes please. We’re going on four months of exclusively using them and they’re still holding up perfectly! They’re available from Amazon and the AlvaBaby website

Two cautions: I’ve heard from a few friends that they’ve seen pretty crazy price fluctuations in the Amazon listings for the diaper bundles (I’m guessing the bundles are being sold by a second-seller trying to make a profit) AND there are apparently some knock-off version of AlvaBaby diapers being sold (which is kind of funny since the Alvas are basically a knockoff of Bumgenius diapers. It’s like the six degrees of Bumgenius). The knockoff Alvas don’t have the AlvaBaby tag sewn on the side – if you order them and that’s missing, get your money back!

It sounds complicated but, if you can sort through the marketing and ordering annoyance that comes with ordering off-brand  – you can get a good product for cheap!

First time in cloth :).

6) Summer Infant 3-Stage Super Booster Seat

As soon as she had some decent head-control (for Evie that was around 8 weeks old) she was ready to SEE EVERYTHING. We carted this little chair everywhere – restaurants, small group, vacation, the kitchen counter, the dining room table, the bathroom counter, church.

At first she’d only be in it 5-10 minutes at a time but, as she got older, she’d sit in there for an hour or more watching me cook, get ready to go out, or playing with the attachable play tray. Personally I prefer to this to the Bumbo. It has a higher back which means she could use it earlier and it comes with the straps and playtray (so no extra cost for them)!

7) Swaddle blankets & Carseat blanket

Your need for these items will probably depend on the season and the size of your baby. Evie loved being swaddled – she instantly slept better when she was snuggled up in something (which was probably due to the fact that she weighed 7 lbs when we brought her home!).

At first we used the SwaddlePod ( pictured on the far left – I found a brand new one at a thrift store for $3.00!). I loved this blanket because there was no wrapping involved and it unzipped from the bottom which made nighttime diaper changes a lot easier.

When she got a little bigger (and a lot stronger) we switched to the Miracle Blanket (pictured in the middle). It was a little hefty in price BUT made the difference in her sleeping four hours or 45 minutes. So…worth it.

When Evie was about four months old and rolling everywhere we started the process of transitioning her out of the swaddle – we used a Zipadee-Zip (pictured on the far right – which I loved! It kept her safe and warm). She used that for about six weeks and it helped her adjust to sleeping in just her jammies. She’d been proudly swaddle free for almost two months now ;).

Also, a baby in the Zipadee-Zip attempting to pick things up is the cutest thing you’ll ever see.

Our carseat blanket was made for us by a dear friend (thanks, Marie)! It was perfect for the cold weather as it kept her warm and much more secure than trying to clip the buckles over a puffy snowsuit!

This picture cracks me up – she was grumpy because she wanted to eat but…her little furrowed brow. I can’t even handle it.

8) Coffee Grinder

Yup. You read that right.

My little $17.00 coffee grinder that we got as a wedding gift has been the best tool in making baby food! It purees soft fruit or steamed veggies with liquid in about 30 seconds. I grind up whole rolled-oats with wheat germ to make for Evie instead of baby oatmeal and I use it chop of meat or cheese into smaller pieces for her. WONDERFUL.

Take that $60.00 Baby Bullet.

9) Head supports

Since Evie spent a lot of time in the swing/carseat/rock & play we bought two head supports to prevent her getting a flat-spot on her head. Worked like a charm!

10) Nursing Pillow

I have to admit. I didn’t purchase a nursing pillow ahead of time and wouldn’t have afterwards unless a friend offered me her Boppy to try (thanks again, Kate!).

It saved my back. Seriously.

A nursing pillow for a baby who can’t support their own head is a must – it was also great as Evie was learning to sit up! We used the Boppy brand pillow but there are several good ones out there.

Honorable mention: The Boppy Lounger. 

Evie actually slept in the Boppy lounger for a while (it fit perfectly in the cradle we were using). If I’d known about the Rock & Play Sleeper it would probably have served the same purpose but, another bonus of the lounger was that we could easily carry her around the house! Until she was strong enough to move on her own it made a cozy resting spot :).

 

So, that’s my list! There were a few other things we used but, for the most part, these have been the ten items that have helped us along over the past 8 months. I’m not being paid for any advertising or clicks – they just genuinely made this list because they were that valuable, haha.

What’s on your list?! 🙂